God's will vs. my will!

Hello friends!

To those faithful followers - sorry for my absence - I've been distracted - to say the least... ha! It's been a little over a month since I picked up this gem in Plainfield, IN on an early thursday morning.

Overwhelmed is a good word, but doesn't begin to cover my thoughts, feelings, emotions, stress, etc...the past 35 days.    God IS faithful!   He has and continues to answer so many prayers in our life.

Greg summed it up best about 2 weeks ago when we were talking and he says, 'When WE choose to live in God's will for our lives, we can't go wrong as God's got it all figured out!'    Where I'm going with that is that had Greg and Jenna got what WE wanted, so many things would have not led us to where we are standing today... together.    So many examples of things we WANTED these past 4 months:

•  1. We didn't want Greg to have to go to jail.... well... we didn't get that wish and he got sentenced to serve out his 3 year sentence counting the time he had already served.   
• 2.  We wanted Greg to get placed at the closest jail facility to Fort Wayne.    We didn't get that either....  However... God knew what was better.    Had Greg went to the facility near me... he'd still be serving out his time through September.   Instead Greg got placed at a short term program that allowed him the opportunity to earn a time cut by attending classes.   

Those are just a few short items that add to our long list of God knowing what was best for us, even when we thought we had the BEST answers.     It just feels so good to know that when your living in God's will for your life, he's got your back... and holds the future in the palm of his hands.

Top highlights of the past month with Greg:

         1. Watching fireworks together on the 4th of July - recognizing his independence.

         2. Being able to worship together at church

         3. No supervised visits!

         4. I always have my very own dinner date.

         5. Greg being allowed to travel out of state sooner than expected (thank you God!) to 

             travel with me to Missouri and Nebraska and see both our families.

         6. Nature walks

         7. Long talks about where God has brought us and what he has and is continuing to teach us.

Among the good, I'd be lying if I told you it was all hunky dorey for me.   I have had to learn to adjust from my independent nature and ways.    Let me tell ya...it's not easy to give up my routines and ways of doing things to accomodate somebody else.    I've been stubborn, grumpy, upset, and down right angry about it.    Change is hard!   Not to mention the added stresses of wedding planning, finances, job searching, etc...   

We have a lot of decisions to make in the next few months and plans to fall into place.    At this point... my PLAN... ( and I say that loosely as it is ultimately up to God what will develop for us)... is for Greg and I to be moved back to Missouri by Mid October, right before the wedding.    I would like to have a job lined up to start by the end of October or first part of November.    Things have already been in motion in that department as I sent my resume in for a job that Cindy found for me on Craigslist of all places (yes...crazy).   They loved my resume and called me up immediately for an interview and I was able to go in and have that interview on Friday of this past week.    I'm not trying to toot my horn, but they already are making it sound like I have the positionl.    I've been praying that God brings me into the right position that doesn't require me to be on call excessively, and provides me a stress free, enjoyable work atmosphere.    So we shall see what unfolds with God's plan in the next few months.

The count is on... our target registry tells me we have 80 days till the wedding.... I can't wait to be Mrs. Jenna Johnson.    

So.. in a nutshell... want you to know that God is faithful.   Can't tell you how amazed I am in my daily interactions with Gregory and how God has transformed his heart into the Godly man I always desired and dreamed about for my future.   Just TRUST... God knows what He is doing!

Single digits

Today marks the official single digits of me bringing Greg home :)   hip hip hooray! 

Tomorrow I leave for Haiti - I am so excited about the opportunity to go.   I board my first flight in Indy at 6am (5am for all my central time followers) and arrive in Haiti 3:45 tomorrow afternoon.   I keep learning about more and more people I 'know' that will be on the trip from Albany or previous trips ~ so I am not only looking forward to connecting with these first timers but also looking forward to connecting with friends made on the last Haiti trip.

There are a lot of things on my plate in the next several months and a lot of things Greg will be challenged by as he enters back into a day to day normalcy.    I would appreciate prayers for us as we continue to seek God in His plans and provisions for us a couple and as individuals.

22hr til I'm on Haitian soil and 9 days til I pick up Greg.   

Also - please pray for Linda Lamb - she has faced all kinds of opposition from Satan, her doctors, church members, family members, etc... about her decision to go on this trip because of her health.   Give us wisdom about the tasks we do each day and what is best for her energy levels and health.

Thanks - talk to ya all next week!

Haiti bound in 24 days

An opportunity has fallen into my lap to go to Haiti June 19th-27th ~  so excited!   I'll be going as a 'caregiver' to the wonderful Linda Lamb!    Any of you who have been to Haiti over the years with MOH know what an amazing woman she is.    We both haven't been back to Haiti since June of 2010.     Excited to see what God has in store for me while I am there.   2 years ago it was a turning point for me as I was reflecting on my relationship with Greg and knew it was over for 'us' as he was walking down a very deadly path, but looking back it is so amazing what God has done in my life and Greg's life since that last trip.     Looking forward to reconnecting with friends while there and seeing what the team can accomplish during our time.

To top it all off, timing couldn't be more perfect as I'll arrive back from Haiti to Indianapolis on the night Greg is released from prison.    Which means I'll be able to pick him up when they drop him off at the bus station early morning on the 28th.     In my book, It'll be a perfect homecoming!

Some memories from my last trip!

Also - looking forward to some R&R with the future in-laws.

As I was out walking this evening with two fantastic women from my life group.....   a kid jumped out of a car in a hot dog suit.     Unfortunately I was unable to grab a picture.... but this was really comical and added some additional joy to a wonderful evening.  

Then I got to have some chinese with JJ & Alicia, followed by a phone call from Greg.   

As I sit here and reflect on the day, weeks, months.... I'm so grateful for the people God has placed in my life here in Fort Wayne, the opportunities to sit on the sidelines of their lives and see their steps of faith, answers to prayers, and watch as God continues to move in mine.

33 days... not that I'm counting or anything.

I miss deep conversations and quaility face to face time with my friends.... the weeks seem to get longer here.     I have not found or formed any friendships here that are beyond surface level or work related... I hate surfacey relationships.... I want nuts and bolts...     still looking here for them.... 

So yes... I miss my QT time....  33 days and I'll get more QT with my future husband... looking forward to that too.

41 days and counting!

Great NEWS tonight from Greg via phone - he got his official paperwork for his 'out' date - JUNE 27th it is, PTL!   

Greg's been worried about it - I kept telling him it will all work out like it should - and thus - it continues to fall into place as God's in control of this journey.

Now... several other things yet to be determined in our lives .... but I'm not worried... God's seeing us through every hurdle, hill, valley, and rooftop.

Who you listening to?

Just had my life group meeting tonight, and I came home and opened my bible to this, which relates heavily to our discussion of several of the women's hearts tonight:

NLT version:

John 5:41-42 "Your approval or disapproval means nothing to me, because I know you don't have God's love within you."

So many of us struggle with hearing God's voice in the sea of swimming opinions, advice, and lies from Satan.

This past 6mo to a year I've had my fair share of voices of what I would like to call 'loving fear' from important people in my life who have questioned the path I am on.     It takes wisdom and a heart in tune with the Lord to make sure you take into account what needs to be heard and what things are potential road blockers to keep you from walking in faith.    I value those words of wisdom from the people God's blessed my life with.... but sometimes you need to pull away from those voices and listen to the only one that matters.
   
Who's approval are you seeking?

Quote from one of the women tonight, "Its easier to for God to move you when you are already in motion."      

Shame.... brokeness.... heartache.... loss.... success.... encouragement.....we all have our own testimony that God has given us to draw us closer, build our faith, and use for His glory!